For Better of For Worse

It's my anniversary. Three years since we said "I do" on a beautiful spring evening before our family, friends, and the Lord.

"First Look" captured by the*Reason

I'd love to write this whole post about how incredible these three years have been, but honestly, some of it has been pretty tough.

Immediately following our honeymoon we moved away from all of our family and friends to Augusta, a city we never really learned to love. Those initial months were difficult as we learned to balance married life with grad school life. But then we found our rhythm and life was really beautiful. We were blessed to live in "our first home", find employment, buy a monster puppy, and finish a year of grad school.

And then we pulled the goalie. Sam started his second year of grad school as we returned from our first anniversary cruise, and we kicked the condoms to the curb. Soon after we had the hardest month of our marriage, possibly our lives. We miscarried. Since then, life has been a whirlwind, particularly this past year.

Our third year of marriage began with a lot of hope. We went to our first RE appointment. We decided to start more advanced treatment. Sam completed his final semester of classes. We moved from Augusta. We had a lot of really really good things going for us.

And then treatment failed, and failed, and failed. I can't really explain the affect the three failed IUI's had on me, and thus our marriage. We've been given fair odds at becoming parents, but for a price. A price we can't currently fathom.

Our third year had a lot of "for worse" in it. We lived with one set of parents or the other for eight of those months. We've lived on student loans alone for so long we don't remember what "date night" is. And we can't even remember what two pink lines look like. The worse sucks.

When does the better start? We are really, really hopeful that year number four is going to be great. There are a lot of things to be excited about, so lets take a look at some of those:

• Sam will accept an offer TODAY for his first job as a physical therapist.
• We will move OUT of my mom's house and IN to a house in Athens
• I will get a job (the odds are high within a year, right?)
• We WILL pay for IVF
• We might get pregnant
• And if we're really, really blessed, we might buy a house within the next year.

Basically, all of that is to say that, yeah, there has been a lot more "for worse" in our short marriage than "for better". We never thought life could be this complex or painful in our twenties, but it is, and it has been. But the really cool part about marriage: you've got somebody to walk through the "for worse" with. And when the "for better" comes, that person understands better than anyone else how much you have to celebrate!

I'm so thankful that we are both in this thing for better or for worse. For richer or for poorer. In sickness and in health. Because we've dealt with all of that in our three short years. Life isn't a cake walk. The streets of life are not paved in gold. But I am oh so very thankful to have Sam by my side through all of these early unforeseen bumps. I have no idea what tomorrow may hold, but I feel truly blessed to face whatever comes with my husband at my side.

Happy Anniversary to the love of my life! I'm so blessed to call you mine! I'm so lucky to be in love with my best friend!