So I called my doctor yesterday because I still had not gotten a positive OPK test. He gave the option of coming in for an ultrasound now or the week after my next period. I chose now. The ultrasound is so hard to understand. All I saw the whole time was fuzzy gray with two huge black spots, which I assumed were my ovaries. I was so bummed because I didn't see little follicles all over with my little eggs inside. Boy was I wrong. My doctor informed me that, no those weren't my ovaries, but two very large cysts, one in each ovary.
The bad news: I have to cancel all treatments for THREE MONTHS and wait to see if these shrink by themselves. That means no clomid, no new treatments, no nothing. This takes my chances of getting pregnant pretty much down to nil. On top of that, my doctor advised that it would be in my best interest to go on birth control for the next three months in hopes that this will help the cysts subside, and might regulate my cycles so that when I come off, my body is more ready to cooperate. I get all that, but man is it hard, when you are so desperate, to consciously choose to eliminate any chance of pregnancy.
The scary news: If these don't go away within three months, I will probably have to have surgery to remove them from both of my ovaries. And the process of waiting is not risk free. The cysts are so large that I am at a greater risk for a ruptured ovary and torsion (twisted ovary). I could end up literally losing one or both of my ovaries. Talk about scary news to someone who wants children more than anything.
I'm trying to stay calm, and honestly right now, I'm kind of numb. This just doesn't seem real. How many things can possibly go wrong in this process that seems so simple for everyone else. Trying to keep my head up, and trust that my doctor knows what he's talking about, and that the Lord is in control here.
The bad news: I have to cancel all treatments for THREE MONTHS and wait to see if these shrink by themselves. That means no clomid, no new treatments, no nothing. This takes my chances of getting pregnant pretty much down to nil. On top of that, my doctor advised that it would be in my best interest to go on birth control for the next three months in hopes that this will help the cysts subside, and might regulate my cycles so that when I come off, my body is more ready to cooperate. I get all that, but man is it hard, when you are so desperate, to consciously choose to eliminate any chance of pregnancy.
The scary news: If these don't go away within three months, I will probably have to have surgery to remove them from both of my ovaries. And the process of waiting is not risk free. The cysts are so large that I am at a greater risk for a ruptured ovary and torsion (twisted ovary). I could end up literally losing one or both of my ovaries. Talk about scary news to someone who wants children more than anything.
I'm trying to stay calm, and honestly right now, I'm kind of numb. This just doesn't seem real. How many things can possibly go wrong in this process that seems so simple for everyone else. Trying to keep my head up, and trust that my doctor knows what he's talking about, and that the Lord is in control here.
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